Close Your Eyes. Make A Wish.
"I'm mad at God because he took my sister."
May was a rough one. On May 4, I lost my a dad, Randall, to a sudden (though not completely unexpected) heart attack (May the Fourth be with you, indeed). A few weeks later, we got the news during a routine OB/GYN visit that we had lost our third child 16 weeks into the pregnancy, after publicly announcing to friends and family via social media, sharing our gender reveal (It's a Girl!), and deciding on a name (Charlotte). According to the doctor, the baby stopped developing two weeks prior, meaning that Dad and Baby Charlotte's hearts ceased beating around the exact same time.
In the days following the miscarriage, we grappled with how to discuss the subject of loss with our two children. Our 18 month-old, Clara, is barely aware of the concept of asparagus, so that was a non-starter. Sadly, my four-year-old son Cooper was well-versed in death. We'd recently lost Murphy, our dog of nine years, to lymphoma, followed quickly by the demise of an ill-advised, impulse purchase goldfish (RIP Fishy Swimmer). But the one-two punch of Poppy and Charlotte proved to be too much for Coop.
"Dad, I'm mad."
"Why are you mad?"
"I'm mad at God because he took my sister."
Look, no one said parenting was easy, but how am I supposed to respond to a statement like that? Especially considering that anger is a valid emotion and one that his mother and I were wrestling with in a slightly more nuanced way. So we let ourselves have the anger. We let a healthy dose of sadness in the mix too. And when the dust settled, we decided that the best way to honor the emotions that stemmed from our negativity was to turn it into a positive.. But how do you do so in a way that might resonate with a four-year old who does not have the patience or understanding for the concept of volunteerism? How can you extrapolate the positivity in an approachable, kid-friendly way?
FREE WISHES.
Kids understand wishes. Blowing out birthday candles. Falling stars. Magic genies. Wishes represent hope, dreams - they're essentially 100% positivity. So, to offset the negativity that May dropped on our family, we're countering with the essential oil of good vibes - Free Wishes. On Saturday, July 9, we'll be at the fountain at the Marietta Square stocked with pennies. Each penny will be distributed by the following guidelines:
- One wish per person
- All wishes delivered lucky side up
- All wishes must remain secret
We'll start granting at 9am, and we'll go until we run out. If none of the wishes come true, we're out three bucks and we'll have spent the morning dedicated to radiating positive energy. But if even one of those wishes come true? What an incredible tribute to an amazing father and the potential of a child.